J: I’m awash with this great sadness again. Probably listening to too much Icelandic music. And facing the reality that I will be alone and lonely for the most part of my life!
P: What do you mean alone? That you cannot have a significant other?
J: No, not that. Even when I have my “other” I’m still this way. Alone in the existential sense. Ano pa nga ba. Everybody dies alone nga, diba? And everywhere I go, I feel this way. Here in the Philippines, I have many friends, but I’m still like this. I guess it’s an incurable disease I have to live with forever.
P:Yeah, it’s an existential issue. Walk through this absurd life with pride, ika nga ni par excellence Albert Camus. Maybe when you leave for a foreign land you’ll ironically feel at one with the world…
J: Maybe I’m really meant for the world! And the world is for me! Maybe it is my other. I always feel alive whenever I’m in a foreign land. The remoteness and the newness of everything fuels my life. Maybe that’s why I like the unheard, the obscure, the rare. Familiarity breeds comfort, but with the unfamiliar, I am home. Random mindfuck like these rule.
P: Sounds like you have a plan to me!
(Contrary to what you may think, I am not talking to myself. Although that’s a thread shy of the entire existential introspection experience.)
